Size of a Large Lime?!?!

I can't believe I'm already nearing the end of the first trimester--tomorrow we will be 12 weeks. I guess so much has happened lately and the holidays are amoung us, but wow...time has really flown by.

I was reading that the baby is now the size of a large lime. about 2.5 inches from crown to rump. That is absolutely incredible. Considering that I am not showing at all (just feeling very frumpy right now), I can't believe there is a large lime sized baby inside of me!

Right after New Year's we will be having our first trimester screening. This is a new test offered since AJ was in my belly. They are measuring the neck size primarily and in conjunction with a blood test, they will be able to say if there is a high likelyhood of genetic disorders. If you are at a high risk, then you go for further testing if you so wish. Personally, I would love my child no matter what, but not only do I want to see the baby SO BAD again, but I would like to prepare myself if this is the case.

So that is the first trimester screening. Technically I'll be 13.5 weeks, but I purposely waited until the last minute JUST IN CASE they can tell me with any kind of more then a 50% chance what they think we are having. That region looks very similar at 12 weeks, but the longer you wait, the more likely they can tell you! Of course, the place might refuse to give me a guess, but I have heard of some people recently that got them to guess! I am so impatient this time, I want to know now!

I actually go back and forth between thinking strongly that it is a girl and strongly that it is a boy. Of course my heart aches for a girl, but I also will be so happy and excited to have a little boy. There is nothing like a mother/son bond (I say this as a mother of a boy and not a girl) and plus it will be really great for AJ to have a little brother to pick on. Basically, I will be happy either way...but I just HAVE TO KNOW! I won't be running out to buy blue or pink for the nursery until the 20 week anatomy scan, but still...it will be fun to know now :). Like, right now.

AJ really is going to be such a good big brother. We are going to take him to a sibling class that our hospital offers sometime in May or June. It should be a really fun class, even if it doesn't really teach him anything. I'm not nervous at all about adding to our family--AJ will really adjust well and I am actually really excited for my maternity leave so I can get some time with both of my kids alone. I can't wait.

Otherwise I have been feeling a bit better. I have felt more human recently, which is nice. I actually am having more of a difficult time with the loss of my father recently then two weeks ago when it happened. I don't know if the idea of it is becoming more of a reality or what. Basically, I'm not sleeping well lately. I'm up for three or so hours every night tossing and turning with anxiety. The sleepytime tea I have I can't take because I'm pregnant, so if anyone has any ideas for me, please let me know. I was getting up and drinking some milk and eating a banana, but that isn't working anymore for me.

I'm really looking forward to Christmas in two days. I can't wait until AJ wakes up and we walk downstairs and he sees his presents. It makes me so thankful for everything I have in my life. I have an amazing mother and stepfather, an understanding and loving brother, a cute as a button nephew, and my heart and soul--my rock of a husband and little boy. My aunt Mary and cousin Shannon immediately sent us a fruit arrangement. I am surrounded by so many friends that are there for me. I have had co-workers send me flowers and make us meals. I have had an outpour of sympathy cards and notes. I can't explain how very thankful I am for all of this. This is what life is about--those that love you.

So as we celebrate the life of Jesus this upcoming Saturday, take a minute to take in everyone you are surrounded by and give them a kiss and hug. Tell them you love them. Life is short, but it can be so fulfilling.